Counting My Blessings

Following on from the response I received to my 'I'm Fine' post the other day, I wanted to share a different slant. 

By nature I am a positive person (believe it or not lol!) - even on the days when 'I'm fine' 😊 and the events and happenings of the past 8 or 9 months have caused me to reflect more so than usual on my life.

I am a firm believer that something good can be found in almost every day, and most circumstances.  Of course not all, and we all have our dark times, but by and large I am a 'count your blessings' kinda girl 😊

It may sound trite but truly I believe there is a right for every wrong, a light at the end of each tunnel (though some may be longer, darker & more perilous than others) and a new dawn after every dark night. 

So I have been striving lately to make my world smaller, focus in on what's truly important, listen and see all the blessings around me.

I am so grateful to have support from so many friends who have really come through for me.  There have been times in the past where I have felt so focused on my narrow little world, consumed by it.  Where I have emptied myself out for others, often the wrong ones, and neglected myself enormously.  But apparently there have been people all along who saw it differently.  Until I quietened the volume, cut out the noise, stopped pouring myself out in the wrong places, I didn't see it and I have been truly overwhelmed by the love and support I have received from so many places.

There's the friend who came & cut up my old sofa, took it to the tip for me - on one of the hottest days of the year. 

The friend who took me to the hospital, sat with my kids & took care of them while I underwent a short procedure and looked after us all, despite the many responsibilities she already has in her own life.

The many friends who message me just to see how I am, send me sweet Meme's or little encouraging texts.  Each one lifts my heart in many ways.

The friend that took me & the kids out for the day when He moved out, and spent the day picnicking and running around after my kids, keeping them occupied & wearing them out so I could just 'be'.

The friend that made sure my birthday didn't pass un-noticed & made me a beautiful birthday lunch of all my favourite things and an armful of thoughtful gifts.

The friend that used a day's annual leave, just to sit in the car with me while I drove a 3 hour round trip to pick up my daughter from her first camp - because she knew I was dreading doing the journey on my own.

The friend that bought a new Captain's hat for my son, so we will always have a back up in case he loses his.

The friend that made me these, 3 hearts 💚💛💜

The friend with a new baby & another under 4 year old, who collected two sets of the Beatrix Potter 50p coins as a surprise keepsake for my children & brought me a bottle of wine 'just for being a great Mum'. 

The friend who was manically texting me map pages after we got lost on our LEGOLAND disaster day!

The friend who invited me & the kids away with them from the weekend, and surprised me with the cutest personalized mug for my cups of tea!

The friend who bought me this to hang on my new bedroom wall, which makes me smile every day -

So very many kindnesses, in so very many ways 💓

And, of course, the opportunities I've been given - finding so many wonderful new friends via Twitter.  Nearly 3000 of them!!

Connecting & working with some wonderful brands to review their products - Letterbox Lab, Smartick Method, Curiosity Box, Sylvanian Families.... with more in the pipeline.

Reviewing books for some wonderfully talented authors -

And making awesome connections with other Mums, parents, Bloggers, Autistic Community, Writers, Home Educators and just fabulous, wonderfully interesting and inspirational people.

So yeah, there are days when 'I'm fine' but on each and every one of them I count my blessings - and I thank you all for being in that number xx

Otis The Robot book series & Teaching Manual - Product Review

I was recently presented with the opportunity to review a series of books by award winning children's author and Primary School Inclusion Manager Jim Carrington.  The series is aimed at teaching social skills to primary school aged children with Autistic Spectrum Condition and social communication difficulties.

The stories themselves centre around a robot called Otis who attends Roboschool.  Although Otis is a robot, the focus of the stories is very much on feelings and emotions.  Otis is by no means 'robotic' in the sense of being without emotion, empathy or imagination.  The analogy is drawn between 'feelings' in Otis's circuitry and the beautiful illustrations are well thought out with repetitive colour schemes, true life imagery and uncomplex facial expressions.  There are no human faces to read in these stories, which can be immensely helpful for some people with Autistic Spectrum Condition.  From my own personal experience, I have found my son can struggle enormously with picture books that have too many faces - he is so confused, overwhelmed or distracted trying to read and recognize everything that is going on, that he is unable to focus or take in the content.   A friend of his, also with social communication difficulties, personally describes himself as a robot and uses this analogy to explain his circuitry and wiring when he is experiencing difficulties.   So although I am aware there is some controversy around using robot imagery in representing ASC, we must remember that autistic children are all unique individuals and there are many who find this imagery comfortable, relatable and accessible.


There are four books in this series -

Otis the Robot Plays the Game

Otis the Robot Shares

Otis the Robot Keeps His Cool

Otis the Robot Meets a Supply Teacher

Each of these are, I know, issues my own children both encountered and had struggles with when they were in primary school.  I wish the school and clubs they had attended had had these wonderful resources!


Each story starts with the identical opening -

which is wonderful for continuity and placement for the children, and then continues to gently and succinctly walk us through the scenario in a concise, easy to understand way - every step supported by a consistent, full colour, illustration.


In addition to the books to read with the child, there is The Manual.   A unique and wonderful teachers resource that covers a broad and vital content for any teacher, classroom assistant, key worker or club leader (I'm thinking Scouts, Brownies, Sports, Social and Extra Curricular clubs). 

There are sections on Encouraging Inference and Deduction Skills, Social Stories, Comic Strip Conversations, Understanding Emotions, Visual Timetables and more.   All presented in a step by step, straight forward and practical way.  This really should be the Go-To resource in every primary school classroom, in my opinion.  I can personally visualize the positive impact on my own children's school experiences had such a thorough, detailed and clearly well researched resource been available.  I think they are also a very welcome & valuable addition to our Home School library of resources, and parents too could benefit greatly from utilizing them.


All the Otis books are available to buy, both individually and as a complete set, from - https://www.ldalearning.com/otis+the+robot

I'm Fine

Sometimes life is hard.  Parenting, adulting, Mum-ing is hard.

It's been a really intense few months for us, lots of changes, some ill health thrown in for good measure.  And I've tried daily to count my blessings, to focus on the positive, to keep my chin up, continue putting one foot in front of the other, smile, support others as best I am able, exercise, eat right, be everything & more to the kids.......

And people ask how I am, how we are, and I say we're fine.  And mostly we are fine.  We really are. But there are times when the I'm fine means so very much more.

This week I have been fine, but also sad, desperate, lonely and tired.  I have felt lost, overwhelmed, burdened and scared. 

This week I have cried, a great many times.  Some of them good tears, cathartic tears, necessary tears.  Tears of release.  Relief.  And sometimes even peaceful tears of acceptance, that I am here, I can do this, I have people who have shown their care and concern for me in a multitude of ways and for every kindness that lifts me I am unutterably grateful. 

I have dark moments, of course, where I wish things were different.  Where I wish that the support had come from those it should have, that I hadn't had to face so much alone.  Times I wish I could say all the things unsaid. 
But I also know that I can and am doing this, and I am proud of me for doing so. 

I also have moments where I just don't know how I am ever going to do everything I have to do.  I look around the house at all the unfinished stuff.  The square of ceiling above the wardrobe that needs painting but I can't reach, whatever is wrong with the plumbing that the pipes scream all day and night and I've tried adjusting the water pressure but I don't know how to fix it.  The garden, my beautiful garden that needs soooo much attention but it is simply not possible to free yourself up for clearing brambles & cutting down a dead almond tree that you are worried will fall on your car, when it is just you and you have two special needs kids to CONSTANTLY supervise.......

And every day, multiple times a day, the house needs cleaning.  After every meal time, and I do mean every meal time, the mess is almost unjustifiable.  Sensory issues means the kids are too heavy, or too light, or assert inappropriate force on everything - and I do mean everything - all the time.   Cups and glasses either slide straight through their hands or they grip so hard they shatter.  They knock in to everything, are fatigued from sitting in a chair and chewing, so the mess of eating is everywhere. literally.  It's relentless, and to be endured a minimum of three times a day.

All the washing - so, very much washing! I have as much washing how as when they were toddlers.  It's the same volume, same issues.  Including wet beds & nose bleeds to clean up after.

And then to address the many broken things - don't even get me started with outside!  Inside alone we have the many holes DS has gauged out of the walls, and patterns he has scraped in to them.  The edges of carpet he pulls up, same with the threads out of soft furnishings, sofa's, cushions.  The milk that is everywhere around the house, always.  The door knob he has removed from his own door, the wallpaper he has peeled off....   Because, you know, compulsive behavior - ALL THE TIME.  

And yes we have sensory toys, we do social stories, we have a climbing wall and weights and lights and everything.  And all these things help, they aid and soothe but they do not stop the onslaught.  Or the heartbreak, knowing it's not his fault but being so frustrated anyway.

Everyone is breaking up for the summer holidays today and talking about their plans. I have no plans. I had planned to go to Spain or Austria this summer.  To have a nice holiday, with a pool, perhaps even relax a bit.

Instead I will be spending the summer wondering how I am going to do this.  Figuring out plans for the longer term.  Trying to magic-ise my daughter's upcoming 10th birthday on a shoestring budget and with markedly less people in our lives that give a hoot.

But I know that despite of all this I am fortunate.  I am blessed.  I have my home, many good friends who have rallied to support us, and a wealth of support from strangers even in the wonderful world of Twitter.  I wouldn't trade or change my kids for anything, even at our lowest ebb.  And I tell them that, frequently, that they know it's ok when they are struggling, we can struggle together and love each other and get through times that are not the easiest, and never be sorry that we are what we are.

So I am ok, I will be ok.   I will crank up the radio, sing & dance as I restore my house once again, do the jobs that need doing, make the pancakes, dry their tears, hold them, reassure them, fix everything.  I am fine. 

It's just sometimes, I'm not, you know?  And that's ok too, right?

xxx