A New Dawn

So, it's been a difficult week in our house.

Yesterday we had the long, long awaited ADOS (Autism Assessment) for our Darling Daughter (aged 9).  And after a number of arduous, uncomfortable hours they confirmed what Mummy has known for so long - that she is also autistic.

This was both wonderful news and a bitter blow at the same time.

I had wanted to know.  I fought for the referral, God how I fought. The teachers, SENCOs, therapists, CAMHS consultants I have gone up against in the past are too numerous, hopeless and depressing to recount. Only for it to be SO GLARINGLY OBVIOUS when you actually get her in a room with the right 2 people.

But of course then the frustration sets in. The frustration at this deeply, horrifically flawed system that gives no continuity of care in this situation.  As everything, it's a postcode lottery.  Our county councils opinion is, if we can afford our mortgage (barely!), we can afford to fund our own care.  We can't 😢

So we got another leaflet, another list of charities to beg and bother 😥 Charities who are underfunded and over-subscribed, who will immediately try to recruit you to their fundraising team and offer to add you to their mailing list (for £135 ANNUAL membership fee!)

Of course there is the Cygnet course you can go on. And who can't free themselves up for 3 hours per week (more likely 4-5 by the time you add travel, parking etc) for SIX CONSECUTIVE WEEKS, during the day, term time (when your kids with additional needs are Home Schooled because THE SYSTEM HAS ALREADY FAILED THEM!!!)

So I argued, and I reasoned.  They placated with cries of what an amazing parent I am, how well informed, in tune, how facilitating, what amazing work I have done with my children, how there is no intervention above and beyond what I am giving them.

NOT GOOD ENOUGH.

What if I wasn't able to do this all myself?  What about a carers break, y'know, ever???? What about if I couldn't do it? Because the day will come that I can't.

Anyone with special needs children will know that Babysitting is a foreign word!! There is a startling lack of willing offers, particularly from those nearest and dearest to you from whom you'd hoped for more.

Over the years, party and social invites will dwindle as less and less people want your unpredictable kids around, and there's nothing you can do - there's no-one ever to leave them with. Not even paid agencies 😥

So you become increasingly isolated, increasingly burdened but nobody cares. Turns out "Every Child DOES NOT Matter" - only the high achievers that affect the League Tables or the average Joe's that maintain the status quo.

Ironically my DD WAS one of those High Achievers. A full 2 academic years ahead in EVERY subject when she was at school. But the damage to her Mental Health, Well Being and Self Esteem were insurmountable.  And so I refused to leave her in an environment, worked like a slave to bring up the class average, with no praise or recognition ( "because it would make the other children feel bad about their achievements!" ) and no help AT ALL for her social and emotional needs ....... because she was "intelligent enough to know how to behave"!!!!

Oh I am so angry, so angry with this system that is failing our children and young people. And will continue to fail them as adults :-(

This 'problem' will not go away.

My children are wonderful, good mannered,hard-working, self motivated individuals.  They need an ENORMOUS amount of help EVERY SINGLE DAY because there are some things they just CAN'T do.........walk safely beside a road, remember to eat, drink, wash,go to the toilet, get appropriately dressed.  They are now 8 and 9 1/2 and in these areas, nothing has changed since they were toddlers - they will ALWAYS need this level of prompting.  What happens when I'm not there to give it?  I tested the theory once - my daughter got to day 3 of not drinking anything at all, I intervened before hospitalization was needed.

But apparently this is ok. Because apparently I will live forever.  Apparently I will ALWAYS be available.  Apparently I have consented to dedicate my whole, entire life - hopes, dreams, career plans - to their round-the-clock care, all by myself, forever.   And apparently, with zero help, guidance or support, I will ALWAYS know exactly what that care entails and what is needed in any given situation, ever.

So this is what I will do.

I will cry, in secret. I will rage in online chats with my fellow Army of Special Needs Mum's.  I will facilitate and enable and teach and keep house and resign all sense of self I ever had.

Because that's ok, right?  Because they're not sick. Because I can do it, regardless of the consequences and long term damage it may be doing to my health and mental well being.

Because that sounds fair, doesn't it?

Merry Christmas everyone!

Books, glorious books

I can't believe the first 7 days of December are gone already!

No Elf of the Shelf here, tree not going up until this coming weekend, but we are none-the-less in the Christmas spirit.  We've written all our Christmas cards and posted them, I still believe (strongly!) in doing this.  We've bought and wrapped all our Christmas presents - the kids have bought their own presents for family out of their own pocket money (I believe strongly in that too!  Christmas shouldn't be a one-way path in to the children, I feel it's important to teach them to sacrifice and give too).  They are really proud of themselves and happy with the choices they've made and the thought they've put in to choosing their presents.  They've wrapped and labelled them themselves, and it means so much because they are giving something of themselves 💖

We've got our advent calendars on the go 🎄😊  Mine is a wooden advent tree, with 24 tiny wooden decorations to hang on it - bought on holiday with DH in Vienna nearly 15 years ago now, and still going strong.   DS and DD bought their own advent calendars this year, I said no chocolate ones. So DS sold some of his old toys and bought himself a Lego City advent calendar, and DD followed suit and bought a cosmetics one. They are both thrilled with their choices 😊

I bought us a Book Advent from my fabulous Usbourne lady - who let me hand pick our books from a fab new range.  So far we've had these beauties -

I really cannot recommend them highly enough.  I'm a HUGE book fan, so it's such a treat to be reading these classics to my little book worms.  We settle down for Listening Time each morning, mostly with DS curled right in beside me so he can look at all the pictures, and DD drawing at my feet.  The Enchanted Castle (originally a novel by E Nesbitt) and The Canterville Ghost (originally Oscar Wilde) were both new to me and both really superb.  The kids favourites so far are Frankenstein and White Fang.  It sets our learning for the day as well, we've journied through the times of pirate, the Victorian workhouses to the Gold Rush and more besides!  Can't wait to see what we get tomorrow!

On the subject of Books, glorious books - some of you may remember the kids and I were lucky enough to preview a friend's debut children's book earlier in the year.  Well, on Monday it came in to print!  Of course we were straight on to Amazon to order our copy and read again about Maud and Dragon's adventures in glorious technicolour!  What struck me, receiving the hard copy in the post today, was just how beautiful Hannah Shewan-Friend's illustrations truly are.  To see them all together in the finished book was really quite a humbling experience.  We are so very proud of our talented friend 😊  If you have any children left to buy for this Christmas, I really don't think you could go far wrong with Inky Babble - https://www.amazon.co.uk/Inky-Babble-Hannah-Shewan-Friend/

Other things we've been doing this week include a trip to one of our favourite libraries (uh-huh MORE books!!) for DD to meet up with her best friend and work on their Lapland geography project together.  They research about the Northern lights, the regions covered by Lapland and the summer's of 24 hour daylight.  They decided they would work on making a 3D scene to accompany their presentation.  For a first time of working together, self-led, they did really, really well.    And DS was excited to find a Terry Pratchett children's book - so we booked that straight out! And, of course, he looked up what he could about his beloved carnivorous plants!

We've also been playing lots of fun games this week :-)  Such as Lego Minataurus -

Given we are BIG fans of Lego and BIG fans of the legend of the Minotaur, this game is the best of both worlds! You can get it on Amazon - https://www.amazon.co.uk/LEGO-190721-Games-3841-Minotaurus/ but my personal advice is have a look on Ebay first.  We recently bought this one second hand on Ebay (complete) for a fraction of the price.

We also picked up this little gem in a charity shop earlier this week -

Still available on Amazon - https://www.amazon.co.uk/The-Green-Board-Game-Co/ - and currently under three quid!! 

A great little game, simple to play, good for reading skills and also subliminal learning as the animals are grouped together in their families - mammals, crustaceans, reptiles and so forth.  Make a great stocking filler 😉

DD's been reading, reading, reading - a couple of new novels, re-reading some Harry Potters and we finally got our hands on a couple of the Goosebumps books for her to try.  So that's kept her going for a couple of days, along with re-reading the Malory Towers series.

And DS has been playing creatively and inventing -

Other excitement includes our new bean bags having arrived today!  Giant, waterproof bean bag floor cushions that can be sat on in a variety of ways.  Sensory heaven for my two 💙  So they've ridden horses, relaxed on life rafts and belly surfed on lilo's!  And, even better, they were delivered in boxes big enough to sit in!  So the rest of the afternoon was spent making and watching Christmas movies in their own houses! 

With books to read!

Happy, happy days :-)

Out of Africa

So, it's been a busy week for us this week.

It was our Geography Club on Wednesday, so DS & DD were busy with their projects.  At the request of several children (in our suggestions box) we were doing the entire continent of Africa this month!   DD decided to do a project on lions in The Savannah - and did some research in to their declining numbers and why their population has been severely depleted in the last 50 years.  Then she made a 3D scene of a lioness hunting -

DS decided he wanted to find out more about the island of Madagascar.  His research led him to the island of Nosy Manitra (The Scented Island) and he settled on doing a project on one of it's volcanoes Nosy Be (pronounced Nossi Bei) -

This month he actually stood up and read out his facts, which was lovely to see as it shows he has grown in confidence with his reading ❤❤❤

We also made food for our Food Tasting table.  There was such a huge wealth of choice this month - given we were covering a whole continent!  We settled on 3 dishes - Mozambique Lemon Chilli Rice (delicious!), Ethiopian Cabbage Dish (gorgeous) and Cornmeal Christmas Wreaths (fiddly but worth it 😏 )  -

Mozambique Lemon Chilli Rice. Find recipe here -  http://www.foodnetwork.co.uk/recipes/mozambique-lemon-chilli-rice.html

Ethiopian Cabbage Dish.  Find recipe here - http://allrecipes.com/recipe/152937/ethiopian-cabbage-dish/

Christmas Wreaths. Find recipe here - http://www.foodnetwork.co.uk/recipes/cornmeal-wreaths.html

We had a lovely group session with such a range of learning - it's so great to have so many Home Educated kids come together and share what has inspired them that month.  I love the variety and the encouragement the kids give one another.

Besides Food Tasting, we had colouring, crafts -

Find instructions here - http://krokotak.com/2015/11/paper-giraffes-so-easy-to-make/

And we had a group activity for the first time, rather than worksheets, for the kids to make an A-Z of Africa.  This proved really popular and most of the children (and parents) dipped in and out of the activity, adding their input.  It was a really great way to draw together and reinforce all the learning -

DS can struggle a lot with Geography Club, due to the noise in the hall and numbers of people, but his projects have been going from strength to strength and he is gaining confidence month on month, so I have persevered.  We have a really lovely group of regulars now who are such a pleasure to meet and learn with.  He really considers them all his friends and said this week was his Best Geography Club ever!  It was the first time he actually sat and did the craft (through to completion).  He also joined in with the A-Z activity, looked through the projects on the Sharing Table and loved seeing some real African carvings one family had brought in.

There's lots more news from our week, but given DD has her bestie over tonight for a wake-over (officially known as a sleep-over but not sure any actual sleeping will get done 😄😄 ) so I'll sign off for now xxx

Trusting your judgement

So, how's the autumn treating everyone?

Wishing a very Happy Thanksgiving to my American friends, whether here, at home, or around the world :-)

And closer to home, are we mentioning the C-word yet???

I, for one, am VERY excited :-)

But in the meantime there's still November to deal with.  And I must admit today was Not my finest hour........

I got myself quite frustrated this morning trying to engage DS in 'doing some work'.  

I don't even know why I did this!! 

Some days we are so on the ball, the learning just flows and we don't 'stop' for weekends etc, if the kids are engaged in something we just carry on.  So why on earth I suddenly had this wobble of confidence this morning I don't know but I decided to wade in to battle and insist he do some comprehension work (his absolute nemesis, and the cause of endless trauma at school).  

Oh dear me Mummy - you fool!!

I think, flushed with the success of yesterday, and the fact we had an AWESOME day of Life Skills, I mistakenly thought today we needed to 'evidence' that his learning was 'on point'.  Also, I think because the C-word is around the corner, I know we will be relaxing our learning and doing all things Christmas and I think I just had a moment of November-madness that I had to prove we have 'done enough'! 

This Was STOOPID!

But, he sat down with me. My sweet boy who wants to please.

He wanted to do Maths. He wanted to make his Madagascan volcano for Geography Club, he wanted to research carnivorous plants, he wanted to do Scratch programming on the computer....... but I was on my "but you've also got to show you can do your written work" drive :-(

Wrong battle, wrong day.

The dear boy sat and conceded to do 6 pages of a comprehension work book, by himself. Just 10 minutes of reading and following the instructions and the stress overwhelmed him. Comprehension tasks are such an issue for him - due to delayed processing, communication difficulties, lack of social understanding and so on.  These are ALWAYS going to be an issue for him.  Why oh why did I try and push him in to an NT mold today???

Quickly I realised the error of my ways just as he dissolved with a "you're going to give me loads of crossings out."

I was mortified! All the stress I've fought to take him away from, all my resolves to be more open to child centered learning and my brain tricked me back in to the conventional thinking that progress can only be measured in proven results (or even that it needs to be measured and proven at all!)

So, we consigned the book back to the book case and got out the Lego box instead.  We tried making carnivorous plants and a greenhouse for them.  We gathered rain water for his Venus flytrap.  We fed his tortoise. We took DD to gym, and while she did her British Gymnastics Level 4 badge (yay!) we played chess, a balancing game and played with the Story Cubes  Https://www.Amazon.co.uk/StoryCubes
(These are a great, fun, handbag size take-along mainstay for us. Different sets of 9 six sided dice you role and make a story from the pictures/symbols you roll).
He wandered and chatted to a few friends, ate his packed lunch, lifted his sister off the floor in a celebratory hug when she passed her Level 4!

We came home, he worked on his Scratch programming, we watched Walking with Dinosaurs, cuddled, had tea together and finally, FINALLY, the I-don't-feel-well My-neck-hurts started to subside.

And now, nearly 10 hours after Mummy's totally misjudged enforced learning attempt, he is peacefully tucked up in bed, trauma assuaged.

And the moral of the story is?  You are enough. You are doing Enough. Your kids are learning ENOUGH.  Whenever, however you approach your Home Learning, you Really Do know your child BEST. League tables Do Not.

So keep doing what your doing (or not doing) and don't let the World, the nagging doubts, the fears engulf you.  This journey is as unique as our children. And that's ok. That's more than ok.  So sit back, and watch them shine.

xxxxxxxx

At Home Days

I can't believe it's only Tuesday!  November was going to be our "Quiet" month, leading in to the excitement of Christmas but what with one and thing and another it seems to be chock-full again!

Starting out with the Into Film festival.  If you're not aware, Into Film run a nationwide festival throughout November, giving free screenings of films at a variety of cinemas and educational downloads to support these, for schools and Home Educators.  If you have not been before, I urge you to look in to it. it's a great free resource - https://www.intofilm.org/events

So, we saw two films last week - Ice Age Collision Course and Kubo and The Two Strings.  And yesterday morning we saw Finding Dory.  All very different films and lots of interesting themes to explore.

Then it was back home for our Learning Group on Monday afternoon.  A fellow Home Ed Mum opted to lead the session this time and had prepared a lesson on tessellation art.  It was a brilliant interactive lesson, where the kids learnt a bit about the maths of tessellation, looked at the artist M. C. Escher and had a go at making their own shape and using this to make their own piece of tessellation art on canvas -

The kids all then hung out and played for a while, whilst we Mums had a cup of tea.  It was lovely watching them play Lego or card and board games together, and winding down from their learning before we all went our separate ways.

It's only the second session we've held but I'm so encouraged by it.  The children are all so supportive and encouraging of each other and it's great watching them learn together.  We've got some ideas for some STEM activities for the next session :-)

And today we have had a lovely At Home day :-)   I have to say, of all the wonderful, magnificent, and hugely rewarding things we do as part of our Home Education program, At Home days are my favourites.  I love it when the kids are just restful and self regulated at home.  When they don't need stimulation or activities or outside agendas and can just find their own way.

Today was a beautiful example of this.  We had a slow start to the day and a nice breakfast of crumpets and tea (or juice!) and then we all did our morning routine things.  Once we were all washed, dressed, tidied rooms, pets done, etc we were ready to begin our day. 

DS decided he would go an play outside for a while, and DD wanted to show me her French workbook she had completed.  So we spent a while together, one to one, marking that and practicing her French oral.   Afterwards, we decided to work through some maths she has been finding difficult (adding fractions and discovering the fraction value of various measurements) -

This has been her nemesis for some time now, but today it finally clicked and she flew through these and more :-)

After this she decided she would have a break from 'work' and do some more of her sequin art she is working on -

I think she is doing SO well.  I helped get her started, as she was a bit overwhelmed when she opened the box, but now she has got the hang of following the pattern and counting the dots, she is going great guns :-)

DS came in from the garden, for a warm milk and a biscuit and (amazingly!) decided he would sit and do some more of his Technology workbook with me!  In fact, he ended up working through the rest of it!  We learnt about microwaves, electric powered cars and the technology of wheelchairs.

After a lovely one to one hour with each of them, I had a coffee break while DS watched videos about carnivorous plants (his current passion) and DD continued with her sequin art.

We had lunch together, and afterwards we worked on some of our Dyson STEM Challenges.  We haven't had these cards out for a while but, again, these are a fantastic FREE resource.  You can apply for a set free online and they are great for inspiring young minds :-)  They used to send you a set in the post, but you can now download them yourself from - http://www.jamesdysonfoundation.co.uk/resources/challenge-cards/

Today we worked on No 39 - Dancing Raisins -

Where we learnt about carbon dioxide and how the carbon dioxide in the lemonade we added raisins to, would attach itself to the denser raisins, increase their mass and enable them to rise. As they hit the surface, the bubbles burst, the carbon dioxide is dispelled and they sink to the bottom again.  It worked brilliantly and it was great fun watching science truly make the raisins dance :-)   Oh, and eating lemonade soaked raisins at the end!

Next we did No 11 - Lights Out

We did this one several times so both DD and DS had turns of lighting the candle and placing the jar over to create a vacuum as the candle burns away the oxygen. 

After this, as all great scientists do, DS & DD wrote up their findings!

And now, as a reward for all their hard work today, they are watching a bit of Harry Potter before Cubs tonight, where they will be doing their art badge :-)

These days are just The Best.  And in a nutshell epitimise what makes Home Ed so do-able.  Because on the focused days, when you strip away all the distractions, we can probably achieve a week/ month/ term's equivalent of learning and all in the comfort of our own home :-) xxxx

Blustery Days

Well Autumn's well and truly upon us now. I've finally succumbed to putting the heating on this week, in short bursts obviously :-) :-)

We had a really busy week last week, including our long awaiting Reptile Handling session.  We were in love!  DS is now even more desperate for a pet snake, and I could happily have brought the gorgeous little Blue Tongued Skink home with me :-)

 So we've had a couple of nice At Home days so far this week. Catching up with ourselves, housework and de-stimulating. Definitely very necessary!

We've also done loads of lovely learning.  Yesterday we started our research on Africa, for our Geography Club project this month -

We also read the final book in the Jack Stalwart series :-)

In the afternoon the kids played outside together and did apple carving -

with the fallen/ bruised apples from the apple tree :-)   They also had a go at ice sculpting, from some blocks of ice DS had frozen.

DD also continued working on our Rainforest theme from our new Learning Group last week. She made a fabulous rainforest picture and cut out pictures of animals and insects that inhabit the rainforest and put them in their appropriate habitat - ground. understory, canopy or emergent layer -

I think she did a great job :-

We also added the food colouring to our crystals we've been growing.  They are coming along nicely -

Then after dinner we settled down and did this wonderful London puzzle together. It was great fun putting together all the landmarks and noting the historical events -

And today I spent some nice 1-2-1 time with DS as he really needed some help focusing his brain on tasks.  We started work on a new workbook together -

Another great find from, my favourites, The Book People :-)

It really sparked his interest and we managed to work through 20 pages before he needed a break.

While we were doing this, DD continued working on her Africa project.  She's been researching The Sahara Desert and while looking at a map of the areas covered by it, she came across a map of the area of Africa inhabited by lions and decided on that as her project.  As well as a lovely fact sheet, she made this awesome 3D scene from pictures she drew herself, of a pride of lions hunting wildebeasts -

  
The kids spent the afternoon playing Spies :-)  This involved leaving notes around the house for each other, to follow clues and solve mysteries.  Great fun, and literacy in action for DS lol!

Speaking of literacy in action, DS also sat for an hour writing his Christmas cards today! Nothing like being prepared :-) :-)

Autumn's Definitely Here

Wow, so we're in to November already!!   Happy be-lated Halloween!   Hopre everyone had fun dressing up, Trick or Treating and celebrating however you like to.   We didn't do Trick or Treating this year - I just couldn't muster the enthusiasm to manage the over-excited, over-stimulated kids.  But we did dress up, I did buy them lots of Halloween sweets :-), we did carve pumpkins -

We did get Trick or Treated, which was great fun for the kids as usually we don't get any callers where we live.  And we did also make Halloween cookies with friends -

So, we did celebrate and have fun, I just scaled back on the unpredictability this year, and the kids were waaaaaay happier and calmer for it!

Sadly though, fireworks season has started :-(   We enjoy an organized display but the random exploding of fireworks absolutely freaks poor DS out!  So we will have many extremely late and unsettled nights now, until this annoying pastime wanes - probably not until New Year :-/

Other things we've been up to since my last post include another fab Geography Club.  Last month we did United States of America.  I LOVE seeing what all the kids come up with! 

And DD managed to do 25 of the 50 states for her State Flowers poster -

DS practiced hard on his Show & Tell and accurately remembered dates and names as he told about The Gold Rush and the 49ers :-)    And we feasted on Apple Pie, Brownies, Chocolate Chip Cookies and Bagels while we learned! :-) 

My own personal highlight though, had to be DS sitting at the front taking notes!!

Anyone who knows my DS knows what a struggle formal learning has been for him, and reading and writing have, and are, not coming easily.  So to see him voluntarily engaging in this way was just a joy to the heart and I couldn't have been prouder!

We've also had Half Term - and I love how our days blend and flow now and transitions are much less stark, and therefore easier to manage.  I love that the kids continue doing their own thing, a mixture of playing and learning, and that we don't have that "I'm bored!" "What are we doing today?" to contend with!

Over the half term DH taught a couple of Lego Education workshops for friends at our home.  The kids had great fun building Mr Learnie and then working cooperatively to build a community together, using their own ideas :-)

He's run 6 of these sessions now, with ages ranging from 5-11, and it's fascinating to see how the kids come up with completely different ideas each time. 

Other things we did included catching up on lots of jobs.  DS finished his Solar System model -

and we enjoyed learning about all the planets in the Solar System.

We also started growing crystals, in white vinegar -

This is the BEFORE picture! :-)  They are growing now and it's almost time to add the food colouring and allow that to absord to colour the crystals.  Will let you know how we get on :-)

Another new thing we've done is to start up a Learning Group, in our home, with a few other like-minded Home Educating friends.  Our first meeting was this Monday - we had 6 awesome children and 4 fabulous Mummies (including us) and our first topic was Rainforests.  It was a HUGE success!   The children loved learning together in a fun, informal way and were wonderfully supportive of each others efforts :-)    They made scrapbooks to put all their information in, and we learnt about the animals and people of the rainforests and had a go at making our own ceremonial masks!

The kids also worked collaboratively together to try and make an A-Z of the Rainforest. Fantastic fun!  The following day the first thing my two did was get out their scrapbooks and continue their work!  Awesome :-)

And it was so simple to organize, just a few Mums working together, sharing resources and planning in advance via a simple Facebook group I set up.  Highly recommend it to anyone whose children struggle to be in a formal working environment but enjoy working with their friends.

I'm sure there's more but I've got errands to run now, before our Reptile Handing event this afternoon - soooooo excited!! 

A final note, please, please, please - if you like this Blog and enjoy following our journey, please sign up as a Follower.  All you will receive are notifications when I make a new post, nothing else.   You can sign up by adding your Email address in the drop box at the side.  You will receive a confirmation Email that you must click on/ accept or you will not be added.

Many thanks for your support xxxxx

A Typical Morning - Sensory Style!

I've had several conversations recently, with various lovely people, about Sensory Issues.  It struck me, from these conversations, that there are so many things I take for granted now that actually aren't part of everyone's lives.  I wondered if reading my posts sometimes people are thinking - pah, her children don't have Autism or Sensory Processing Disorder! Look at all the stuff they do - there's no way they have those issues...... 

So I just thought I would take a few minutes to tell you the usually unwritten tale of our morning so far, on a typically ordinary day.  Today is not a Bad Day, it is actually a Good Day. Today is the best kind of day it gets, and yet this is how it has unfolded thus far....

DS has wet the bed - for the 23rd day in a row.  He is 7.  In the body of a 10-11 year old.

So, 23rd day in a row of wet bed.  This is because at the moment he is over-tired.  This is because of Sensory Issues - he has had a loose tooth and has a blocked nose (probably because of the tooth).  All of this alters the world ENTIRELY for him, as it is not how Things Should Be.  Consequently this causes a breakdown in communication between his brain and his body and a breakdown of the order of things.  This causes wakefulness, amoungst other things (a MASSIVE increase in Stimming - Self Stimulatory Behaviour - and physical manifestations).  So, the knock on effect of that is a wet bed.

Two weeks ago I replaced the mattress, and mattress protector, and we now have a fully waterproof mattress (rather than one sided) and I do 3-4 loads of washing a day to clean his bedding, and try and keep up with everyone elses washing at the same time!

So, that was the first thing of the day.

The Tooth Saga continues to affect our entire day today - as yesterday he pulled it out.  He couldn't bear the sensation any longer, and literally pulled it out of the gum.  In doing so he has broken the tooth.  This is the THIRD time he has done this :-(   So we are off to the dentist today to be X-Rayed and see whether they need to remove the remaining shards of tooth (Gee Whizz that's gonna be a whole Humdinger of fun right there!!!)   In the meantime, we are surviving with Calpol, ice cream and cold milk...... 

It also means we are going to have to get the train, as today DH has had to take the car we share to work so that he can take it for new brake pads/ discs as I was not going to do that on top of the whole dentist thing with two stimming autistic children in tow!

So, back we are to getting DS cleaned and dressed - this involved him wandering off and drawing the numbers from 14 to 100 in permanent marker on printer paper??  (I know!) Which of course went straight through to the table cloth.....

Amidst this, DD is wandering around, not quite sure what to do with herself as no-one has prompted her in to Start Up mode!  She is unable to think a cohesive thought such as 'breakfast' or 'get dressed' without prompting (SO MUCH PROMPTING!!!). She is 9.  Yes, 9.  And yes, she needs this prompting ALL THE TIME.  EVERY DAY.  ALWAYS. 

As I was busy, doing Different Things, I was unable to Prompt her - so she wandered and roamed, quite literally lost and confused - almost like a robot without programming :-(   Eventually she let the rabbit out!  Then got Super Stressed that the rabbit was out and she realized (more than 2 hours after getting up!) that she was now cold and hungry....   Of course there was much screaming, and a lot of pointing at the floor and non-verbal signals (hard for those that know my highly eloquent girl, to imagine) until we established - with much help and prompting from Mummy - that she needed to put the rabbit away, get dressed and have some breakfast (she still hasn't by the way! She is dressed, in a Halloween witches costume, but still nothing to eat or drink!).  I am still prompting (3 1/4 hours since she woke up!) - we will get there, eventually!!

Hmmm, what else - oh yes, put the rabbit away!!  Make sure other pets are fed and watered and whatever they need (I prompt, they do :-) )

DS is now dressed, in acceptable feeling clothing - this means changing yesterday's socks at lightning speed as we currently have a Thing about bare feet.  He cannot bear the sensation or the look of bare feet.  This is one of the (many!) reasons he wants to quit gymnastics, as he sometimes has to take his socks off.  It also means none of us can take our socks off in his presence, at all, ever.

Then is means finding the softest pull on clothes.  Pants are currently on the IN list, so that's a battle we're not having to have at the moment :-)

For DD, same - although she prefers not to have socks as they "crunch" or "squash" her toes - so we do have to have that battle as, at the moment, his inability to tolerate bare feet supersedes her desire not to wear socks (as we do have a number of 'acceptable' pairs of socks!).  But everything else must be soft, button-less and pull on. It CANNOT be tight and it CANNOT be loose and floaty.  Unless it is a dressing up thing - then she has to squeeze in to it like a sausage!!!!

Anyway, so back to empty the washing machine and put on the second load.  Check train times for journey to dentist later.  Make sensor-ally acceptable packed lunches, as we will be Out at lunch time, due to Dentists appointment and cannot rely on being able to get something acceptable to the palate !!   Bear in mind at this point please that before I had children I was very much in the "Children will eat what they're given, wear what they're told, do as they're told!" camp!  Oh, how life taught me a "bite-in-the-ass" lesson!  Lmao!!

So yes, lunch needs to be vegetarian (their choice, they won't eat a dead thing!).  For DD it must pretty much be white or pale yellow and not touching any other food group whatsoever. It must not be wet, blended or a mixture of food (ie she can have a white bread cheese sandwich and some sliced cucumber in a separate pot) but DO NOT put the cucumber in the sandwich - this will make you an unimaginable, despicable, tortuous &*(%$^# ! DS on the other hand is slightly easier to please, as long as you are doing a brown bread peanut butter sandwich.  If it is anything else at all you are pretty much f****!  This presents a massive problem now there are so many Nut-Free Zones :-(  In which case we are probably having milk, and maybe a flap jack!

So now we are doing Halloween colouring, while I type this to you good people - to share, as I've said, that this is a typical morning on a Good Day.  It is 10.30am, so we still have the lion's share of the day (and night!) still to go!

Oh dear God and now DS has hiccups!!!  Action stations people ;-)

:-) :-) :-) :-) :-)

Awesome Autumn

Please tell me I'm not alone in not quite believing how quickly October has crept up on us?!  October???!   Wasn't it summer, like yesterday?

So, we've had lots of outs-and-abouts this past week.  At the weekend it was Granny's birthday so we took her out to one of our favourite National Trust places for lunch and a nice autumn walk :-)  It turned out they had some sort of Autumn Festival event on, which was a bonus.  Lots of lovely hands on stuff for the kids to get involved in.  They made butterflies, pressed apples to make (and drink!) fresh apple juice, played African drums (tenuous connection there!  I think the idea was that they had numerous instruments made from dried gourds etc :-) ), attended a fab talk about bees and helped with the honey harvesting AND ground wheat to make their own bag of flour that we brought home with us!  This was all, quite literally, DS Heaven :-)

The following day we went to a FAB Fun Day, organized by a lovely new Home Ed friend (that organized the Home Ed camp we went on this summer) raising money for Alzheimer's research.  She had done an AMAZING job pulling it all together - they had stalls, a band, food, all the firm favourites like tombola, raffle, hook a duck plus face painting, glitter tattoos, bouncy castle and climbing wall!  Well DS and DD were back in Heaven again!  They LOVE all this kind of stuff but always found the school fairs too over-crowded and competitive.  This was laid back and just great fun, no pressure on anyone to do more, win more, spend more.  We stayed for the whole entire time, and won an Usbourne books voucher in the raffle :-)  And about a million tombola prizes! :-)

Monday kicked off with a big trip I'd organized to The Tower of London.  44 Home Educating adults and children, set to do a digital mission at the tower!  What a wonderful day!  The sun shone -

 
and there was just so much to see and do, and LEARN :-)   And the kids had an absolute blast, running around the tower and grounds with their iPads, trying to solve the clues on the Digital Mission to help Arbella Seymour aid her husband, William, to escape the Tower in 1611.  Pleased to say we succeeded :-)

Yesterday we were at home, yay! The kids have continued working on their USA projects.  DS watched a couple of educational videos about Prospecting and The Gold Rush for his Wild West Project -

And DD continued working on her State Flowers display -

 

(which I happen to think is just Stunning :-) ).

We spent a couple of hours out in the garden together, reading, chatting, playing.  DS made his own bow & arrow out of wood and string and made himself a target with our giant chalks. I was surprised how far his arrow flew! :-)   While DD sat with me writing her birthday party invitations.  The kids have decided to have a joint party this year, as they share many of the same friends and, well, actually like each other these days! :-)

And while we were out there, DD found this magnificent little fellow -

I'm reliably informed (by a couple of fellow HE Mums) that he is a Pale Tussock Moth caterpillar.  We've looked him up on the internet, he is :-)  So we looked up what he eats etc and went on a quick nature walk where we picked/ cut oak, beech and birch for him, filled a tank with an inch or so of soil (that she has a water spray to keep moist), put in our twigs etc and carefully lifted him in.  He climbed up the tallest twig, appeared to drink a few droplets of water and then nestled down on a birch leaf.  This morning DD woke up to find he has already begun spinning his cocoon!  I can't tell you how excited we all are!  I'll get some pictures to upload of his progress :-)

Last night the kids had Cubs and DS got a special badge for having belonged to the Scouting Group for 2 years now (he was previously a Beaver). He was SO proud of this :-) 

This morning, after inspecting the Pale Tussock Moth cocoon, DS decided to make some Lego (customizing his X-Wing that DH got him in The Daily Mail on Saturday!) -

 

and then we headed off for a nice splashy walk in the rain (aka Mummy needed to pick up a prescription and buy stamps!)

DS loves the rain and was feeling very happy and like this was a Really Good Day, so he decided to make a tea party!

DD continued working on a writing a letter in German (having received one from a lovely HE friend, also just starting to learn German).  This led to another friend asking me if she would like to write to their daughter, in either French or German, as she also is starting out :-)  DD very much DID want to - as she loves writing and receiving letters, and making friends this way.  So she opted for French, having just done German, and she popped those both in the post this afternoon (after having some cake of course!)

Besides this we've read, coloured, created, helped each other with chores, talked and listened.

I just LOVE how Home Ed gives the children the time and space to pursue their own interests, at their own pace.  I love that they love learning, and that everything is an opportunity for learning. I love that, right now, we are able to make this work as a family.  I hope and pray it can continue for as long as we need it xx